Over the past few weeks there have been major changes in my life. I started a second job; I quit that job. I quit my job at the hospital. And I have been trying not to panic.
I thought I could handle two jobs, let me tell you. I cannot. I am just not made to do it. My anxiety level went to an unmanageable level. I had to quit. They were really understanding about it. It was kinda surprising honestly, but I am grateful. I would totally love to work there in the future. It was great the few days I did work there.
The hospital job, has been some place I worked for the summer for the past six years. It provided most of my income to support myself and some school expenses. I started when I was barely 18. I worked my hardest every year. It has been consistent and many of my coworkers were great. A few people could not let me grow up, they felt I needed their specific supervision. I am an adult, I am independent and I was very good at meeting deadlines and my job in general.
I realized it was time to move on. And if I am being my candid self, a few coworkers kept reporting me as not doing my work. I wish people could stay in their own lanes and focus on their work. It got so bad that I didn't enjoy it anymore and I knew I had to leave. Work place bullying is a problem. If you are reading this, please judge people on their work and their ability not their age. Age is not always a reflection of experience.
I will miss my friends at work. They are great people. I miss it, but it was a safe place. There was a lot of learning on my part. It has helped me become the person I need to me. At this point in life, growth and personal development are vital. Every choice I make matters. I need to stretch myself as much as I can.
Another reason I left is because my University said I need 400 hours working with children, before I start my program.
This solidified that I needed to leave. Up until this point, I was unaware of this requirement. Upon this discovery, the search began. After a pretty intense freak out of 
I made a profile for a nanny website. I had many job offers. It took some research and a few interviews.
I found a job to be a nanny!
I didn't mention all of this to anyone because I was experiencing like 5 emotions at once.
I felt like my brain couldn't take all of this.
And this would have been my reality:
And there would be a lot of this:
People do not need facebook rants. I don't need to dump on other people. I wanted to tell everyone. I just couldn't do that to other people. So I bottled it up until there was some stability again. Keeping my mouth shut was a really good choice. It would have been a crazy roller coaster that no one else needed to go on. Most would think I was a train wreck.
My ducks are in a row( for the time being). I am a happy camper.
